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26 May

Shit dermatlogists don’t tell you about Oratane

When I was younger I used to get weird, unexplainable rashes on my body. This one time I swam in the sea at Struisbaai with my brother and when we came out I looked like a leper.

I was really upset, not only because it was itchy as fuck, but also because I looked like a leper and not a leopard.

In my first year of college it acted up again, and I got rashes on my chest. It was really annoying, because I LOVE fashion and I used to only be able to wear tops that covered my whole chest area. It was so bad, that the other day when one of my college bffs heard that I’m on Oratane, her response was: “Kry jy dan nogsteeds kak weird rashes as jy net na ‘n muur kyk?”

The answer: NO.

Why? Because a few months ago I started drinking Oratane. What is Oratane? In medical terms it’s medication that works by cutting down on the amount of oily substances made by glands in your skin.

In Anja terms: It’s medication that makes your skin drier than a Bruce Willis movie, but cures acne/rashes and any other skin condition that you might have.

When I started drinking Oratane the dermatologist gave me a little booklet to explain all the side effects, which reminded me of a Sex Education book that Juno got at Planned Parenthood or something.

Anyways, it explained that your skin will become very dry and that your eyes might be a little red.

That’s true, but let me explain the degree of dryness that you will experience.

When you wake up in the mornings, your lips will be as dry as a Savanna ad.

Your nose will peel and even if it’s the middle of winter, it’ll look like you’d just gone on a summer holiday without any SPF.

Sometimes your skin would be really moist (ugh, that word!), and you’d think that the worst is over. And then BOOM! You’re a lizard again.

As far as red eyes go, have you ever watched Vampire Diaries? No? Well, when the vampires are really hungry their eyes are all bloodshot and they look like shit.

That’s what you look like ALL THE TIME when you’re on Oratane.

Every day you look like you watched the scene in Lion King when Mufasa dies.

My eyes are so dry that I need to wear sunglasses everywhere I go, and even though I want to shinkick people who wear sunglasses indoors, I’m sometimes tempted to do it too.

People at work are always freaked out when I go out for
lunch and come back looking like I’d crazy cried.

These are a few of the side-effects of using Oratane, but there are some cool shit too.

For instance, your hair stays clean FOREVER. I swear. Before I started drinking Oratane I washed my hair every second day, and now I wash it every SEVENTH day. And then it still looks as shiny as a Disney princess’ hair.

You will also see significant results. My skin is completely rash free, and I’ve only been drinking the pills for 2 months. (I have to drink it until November.)

If you have any skin issues, go to your dermatologist and ask him what your options are. If he suggests Oratane, think it through carefully. As you now know, it has a lot of side-effects, but they’re worth the trouble.

At the end of this year my skin will be crystal clear and I’ll look like I’d just been retouched by Vogue’s angels.
But for now I’m spooning with Lip Ice and eyedrops.

Anja Wintour

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<p>Hello! Thanks for checking my blog out – I like you already! If you want to suggest a topic, please drop me a mail on [email protected] Email address is PR-friendly too! Love, Anja</p>

11 Comments
  • maree

    Roacutan/orutan is letterlik die enigste permanent oplossing van aknee omdat dit werk in op al die aspekte in van aknee. Die pil en antibiotika wat hulle vir jou gee werk bv net in op 2/4 of 1/4 aspekte so die resultate sal nooit wees wat n mens wil he maar ongelukkig moet mens baie keer eers daardie gebruik voor hulle vir jou roacutan gaan gee. Mens hoef nie geld te spandeer op duur gesigprodukte want dit werk eerlikwaar nie. Dink by jouseld hoe lank tyd spandeer dit op jou gesig?Al waaraan jy moet geld spandeer is n baie goeie sonblok en n serum. Sterkte! Ek is ook nou op dit vir die 3de keer en die resultate is awesome!

    May 27, 2013 at 9:14 am Reply
  • Hester

    Maar waarvan kry jy die rash?! Wat is die oorsaak? Toe ek op skool was, het ek cold urticaria gehad (in Hester terme was ek allergies aan koue). As ek geswem het, ‘n koue wind op my gewaai het of self ‘n koue blikkie koeldrak vas gehou het, het ek opgeswel in hives en gelyk soos die Oros mannetjie. Mens kry klomp verskillende tiepes urticaria… friction, pressure, temperature extremes, exercise, and sunlight. ‘n Antihistamine het my uitgesort. Maar om in ‘n rash uit te slaan is kak embarrassing! So I feel your pain.

    May 27, 2013 at 10:01 am Reply
  • Caterina

    Out if interest did you ever work out what the rash was caused by? Diet related issues maybe? Or allergies? I was under the impression Roacutane was only for acne-related issues. But glad it’s helping you! Hope the side-effects don’t cause you too much grief Anjatjie! X

    May 27, 2013 at 11:39 am Reply
  • Lee

    Funny as hell

    August 9, 2016 at 5:52 am Reply
  • Wynand

    Hi. I’m a guy and experienced constant exhaustion. Sometimes almost falling asleep at the gym. Doctor found I had an extremely low level in one of the ‘base hormones’ (can’t remember the name). This basically effected everything else, especially Testosterone levels. Gave me DHEA as a hormone supplement which worked wonders, but gave me acne on my back and chest like you can’t believe. Thus he gave me Oratane to stop/ minimize oil production and Spiractin (generic) to improve skin appearance (this is a really awesome little pill). Yes, you do dry out very quickly if you take Oratane every day, but I found that I can actually skip taking it for about 3 days. Doing this helps my skin not to dry out as much, but still keeps any skin-outbreaks at bay.
    Maybe ask you doctor if you can skip days or get a lower concentration of Oratane.

    July 12, 2017 at 6:06 pm Reply
  • Mishka Govender

    Thank you, Thank you, Thank you! I have been experiencing this way same side effects and I was under the impression that I was the only one going through all this dryness and flakiness! Its the worst, it really messes with your self confidence – I needed to read this as my face is xxxxxtra dry today!

    September 18, 2017 at 2:49 pm Reply
    • Mishka Govender

      *very*

      September 18, 2017 at 2:50 pm Reply
  • JG

    Made my day! Hahaha

    November 7, 2017 at 1:10 pm Reply

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