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Brazilians are very lekker people. They patiently wait for you to type on Google translate and are happy to do the same for you. They are always happy to help. Someone literally just stopped traffic for me to help me cross the road 😭

About 9 hours ago from Anja van der Spuy's Twitter

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17 Jun

How to pine after a crush: A pictorial by Anja van der Spuy

Okay so you’re chilling at home, watching Youtube videos and checking tweets when suddenly you think:

Hey, I wonder what my crush is up to?

So you head over to Facebook and check out his profile.

Then you get really sad, because WHY IS HE SUCH A BABE?

And then the pining starts.

Step 1 -Take off all your jewellery

Step 2 – Tie your hair back, because nothing says “fuck you, I’m sad” like a Britney Spears bun

Step 3 – Put on your jammies – preferably ones that smell like R Kelly’s sheets

Step 4 – Pour a glass of wine

Step 5 – Keep stalking his profile. Wait, is that a girl in his profile picture?!

Step 6 – DRINK

Step 7 – Ugly cry

Step 8 – Get into bed and pillow cry

Step 9 – Google someone who is an even hotter mess than you

Step 10 – Feel a bit better about yourself

Step 11 – Raid the fridge for comfort food

Step 12 – Cry some more

Step 13 – Google another guy you have a crush on

Step 14 – Find out that he has a wife

Step 15 – Freak out

Step 16 – Rather Google a girl crush

Step 17 – Realise that she also has a boyfriend – cry some more

Step 18 – Drink a shitload of wine

Step 19 – Get white girl wasted

Step 20 – Pass out

THE END

7 Comments
  • Jess

    HAHA. too great!

    June 18, 2013 at 8:16 am Reply
  • Naidene Cooper

    Brilliant!!

    June 18, 2013 at 9:45 am Reply
  • Siyaam

    Hilars! Love your posts πŸ˜‰
    http://www.simplysiyaam.com

    June 18, 2013 at 11:36 am Reply
  • Kerry

    Haha love this

    June 18, 2013 at 2:14 pm Reply
  • Shafeeqa

    Hilarious!! πŸ™‚

    June 20, 2013 at 8:05 am Reply
  • Elrese

    Oh this is just too funny!!!

    June 21, 2013 at 11:09 am Reply
  • Nwabisa

    This is too insightful! ROTFL

    May 13, 2014 at 12:06 pm Reply

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