I see you, you sneaky shit. You pretended to go away, and then waited for everyone to get used to sunny weekends before making an appearance again.
Every year you overstay your welcome in Cape Town. You are like the friend who keeps saying “Just one more!” when all I want to do is go home and take my bra off.
I am usually okay for the first two months, but after the end of July I find myself staring at the calendar, praying for September to come. And then what do you do? You take your sweet time, you drol. As if that’s not enough, you also love trolling us with half-arsed sunny days.
What kind of weather is this? Is it sunny or is it cloudy? HOT DAMNIT JUST MAKE UP YOUR MIND.
I am so blerrie tired of wearing boots and jackets everyday, and my legs are so white they could start their own yacht club. When will you get off the stage and allow spring/summer to take the spotlight? Don’t be like Adam Sandler; admit when it’s over.
Please just stop being such an attention-seeker and go away. Bring summer back so that the people of Cape Town can prosper and Joburg people can scare the shit out of us on our roads.
Just let go now.
P.S. I don’t want to see you again until next May. APRIL IS NOT WINTER. Google that shit.