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Mom's a preschool teacher. When she phones me our convos go like this: “Anja, ek wou –“ “KNIP NET DIE PRENTJIE UIT!” “-hoor hoe dit gaan?”

About 47 minutes ago from Anja van der Spuy's Twitter

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15 Apr

Red carpet rant: MTV Movie Awards

Last night’s MTV Movie Awards delivered a few beautiful outfits, and celebs like Emma Watson and Selena Gomez looked really amazing. But I’m not here to talk about those. I haven’t done one of these red carpet rants in a while, so I have A LOT of pent up bitchiness. So please excuse me while I put my best pair of judgepants on to tell you exactly what I thought of last night’s worst dressed. Ke$ha Makeup: Kids, this is what happens when you have an STD. Outfit: There’s just too much going on here. As separate pieces I don’t hate what she’s wearing – I actually like the hat and fringe top. But put together she looks like a drunk (and blind) cowboy. Positive: Luckily...
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12 Apr

Crushcrushcrush

I will be the first to admit that I have a billion crushes. Some of them are animated (Dimitri), others are fictional (John Snow). I also have social media crushes (funny/hot guys I have on Facebook or follow on Twitter). DON’T JUDGE ME. Lastly I have real life crushes. They’re the ones who make me listen to sad white girl music like Christina Perri while stalking the shit out of their Facebook photos. When I talk to them everything that comes out of my mouth sounds like this “JHwrfjswrfjwoeraojfawkfjkjfalwrfja” because they make me so nervous with their HOTNESS. There are a few things that always stand out to me about having a crush. No matter who the guy is, I always do...
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10 Apr

All I want for my birthday is…

So my birthday is tomorrow, and my parents still don't have a gift for me. The reason for this is because every time they ask me what I want for my birthday, I give them answers like this: To relive Lady Gaga’s Cape Town concert A pet leopard A P-GAY An extra middlefinger  John Snow To never attend a meeting again A leopard print car For Groupon to fuck off Patience An attractive morning face A tiara  For every copy of 50 Shades of Grey to be destroyed in a bonfire An invisibility cloak A dishwasher that can unload itself The ability to use a public bathroom Cara Delevinge's eyebrows   For all the Ugg boots in the world to spontenously combust   Smaller feet (that can fit into pointed shoes) Audrey Hepburn's surname The right to bitch klap irritating people This house ...
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2 Apr

“I want to move to Tokyo and be a princess!”

When I was little I was obsessed with the movie Anastasia. For three reasons: a.) Dimitri is was my dream Disney boyfriend b.) Anastasia is a total badass and her nickname is Anja c.) She went through life not knowing that she's a princess, and then one day BAM! She became a Romanov princess. I do realise that none of this really happened, and the poor Romanovs were torn apart by one of the most evil men in history. But I choose to focus on the  20th Century Fox Animation Studios adaptation. Anastasia gave me hope that one day a long lost family member will show up and tell me that I'm a princess. I even practiced wearing a crown and looking like a total grand...
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